Having good boundaries is one of the best skills that we can learn, as it protects us from those who want to push, take and have expectation of us – and yet it’s arguably the most difficult thing to implement, for many.
How often do people ask for your time, your input and effort all to benefit them, and you cannot seem to say no? Saying no is very powerful, yet why do we find it so difficult? For some it’s about wanting to please or to be liked, for others it’s a lack of confidence. So many of us were taught to ‘put others first’. I challenge this idea and believe that whilst we are not MORE important, we are equally as important as everyone else. Without our own strength and wellbeing, we are useless to others anyway. Protecting your most valuable commodity (your time) is of the utmost importance. The beauty of being boundaried is that others will, in time, respect you more and ask for less. It’s human nature to go to the one that always says ‘yes’. We are all trying to get our own needs met ultimately, but learning what your boundaries should be and how to communicate them effectively is a really important step in protecting your mental health and wellbeing. We should never apologise for putting our needs first from time to time.